On this, the first day of the week, it also happens to be the last day of the year.
What an interesting juxtaposition.
An intersection of an alpha and omega, a beginning and an end.
And so 2017 comes to a close.
What else can I say?
The status quo is status quo.
Again it seems the focus is still on my economic woes. The job front continues to be a source of consternation. I did return to that amusement park for a third season (and would be welcomed back for a fourth). I balanced that with a part-time position at a branch of the county's library system; however, that ended five months into a six-month probationary period. Fortunately, two weeks after that, a two-year old application for a school crossing guard position came to fruition. It is not much in terms of an income, but at least I still have a sense of usefulness. Perhaps along with St. Anthony of Padua it's time to add St. Jude into the mix.
Lest this dourness color your perception of what is happening in my infinitesimal corner of the universe, let it be known I am still grateful for what has happened the past twelve months. I still live, move, and have being. While the dismissal from the library was a psychological punch in the stomach, one that brought my self-worth to my knees for a time, I still grasp onto the hope I will find something gainful and full-time. While my value as a human being is seemingly tied to the size of a paycheck, I know it isn't.
Beat up by the world as I am, I realize my problems are not as bad as many in this world, especially those who world have been turned inside out and upside down by natural catastrophes and man-made calamities. I am still learning to bear my cross profitably. At least my prayers can be their Simon of Cyrene.
For that is where we all can turn. It is not, "My God, my God, why have you abandoned me?" It is remembering I am fearfully, wonderfully made in His image and likeness. His divine indwelling in me is more than enough; His Grace is sufficient. Introvert that I am, it is within my soul where I will meet the living Triune God, who will show me how to love, how to have faith, how to hope and trust. If this is not my cornerstone, I really do have nothing upon which to build.
Perhaps this is the real meaning of "Go Forward".
Which is all I can do in 2018.
Which starts at the end of this day.
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